The Beginning

I have decided to keep a record of my battle with breast cancer that began when I found a lump in my left breast on Feb 3, 2006. I was in the shower doing a routine self-breast exam and found it. I had a ultrasound and mammogram on Feb 14, 2006 and then a biopsy on Feb 21st. My results came back on Feb 23, 2006 as Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. I can say that it was the most frightened I have ever been in my entire life. I had an MRI and then a lumpectomy with sentinel node biopsy on March 3rd and I am currently waiting for the results. The results are not going to change my diagnosis, just give me the chances/percentages of recurrence of cancer in the future. I know I have to go through chemo. Adriamycin, Cytoxan and Taxol to be exact and radiation afterwards. While receiving chemo I am having genetic testing to see if I have the BrCA1 or BrCA2 gene for breast cancer. If I do my chances of recurrence are 80-87%. I will have some big decisions to make if I do carry the gene. My tumor (I had 2) were negative for estrogen, progesterone and HER2 receptors otherwise known as "triple negative". I have so much that I want to write but I had to just sum up whats been happening and then fill in the blanks later.
I had my surgical drain pulled out today and it is hurting me a bit more than yesterday which is unusual because it should hurt less. Maybe its just some swelling thats causing it? Next appointment is with another oncologist for a second opinion (about treatment) but I know by now that they all are sugesting the same treatment because I am so young and I would like to live more than another 20 years. I am 34 years old right now and have been married for 7.5 years. I have 2 children, a girl who is 6 and a boy who is 3. My daugher is old enough to understand whats going on with Mommy and I try to give her the best answers that are truthful without frightening her. If this journal can help me to be positive or help others to be positive and give them some hope than that will make me happy. I have so much more to write but I am so tired right now, so off to bed I go...