Tuesday, May 29, 2007

A Pompous Ass Otherwise Known as a Surgeon

The title just gives it away doesnt it? After almost 7 days of not hearing from the orthopedist I received a phone call from him. The only reason he did call was because I had called earlier in the day and got angry at his Physician's Assistant and told him that basically I WANTED A RETURN PHONE CALL TODAY because it was WRONG to make me wait over a holiday weekend in limbo. The phone rings at 5:15pm, right on time to ruin my dinner. He goes on to tell me that taking out the tumor might not solve my pain issues and that the pain might be totally unrelated to the tumor but he will remove it "if thats what I want". He had said this because when he asked me where my pain was I had told him that it was mostly in the back of my leg going down the back of my calf like typical sciatic pain. I also told him that it sometimes will hurt in the front of my thigh. He seemed to be fixated on that one statement by me and thats why he said that surgery might not solve my pain issues. I replied saying that I know my body very well and I have been through a lot. Many times doctors have told me that one thing was causing something and I disagreed. In the end I was right every time. No one knows my body better than me and I know that this tumor is the cause of my pain. He went on to say that I was being "difficult" by "not listening" to what he was saying and I was listening to him. I told him that I understood what he was saying, he was the one being difficult and rude by not understanding the patients point of view. First of all its not about "If I want it removed" It has to be removed because #1 it is causing me pain, #2 there is a small chance it can be malignant and you wont know that until it is removed and biopsied and #3 my oncologist and GP both said that it should come out because of the small chance that it can grow to be malignant and also if it grows bigger around the sciatic nerve its going to be harder to remove without the possibility of causing damage during the removal. Are those reasons good enough for you doc? I told him that and he said, "I have never had a patient talk to me in this rude manner." He said this like I didnt exist and like I wasnt on the phone with him. Hello there, I am right here on the phone asshole! Maybe you can stop kissing the mirror for 2 seconds to talk to your patient in a more personable manner with compassion and kindness. He himself had stated that I had been through a lot so I couldnt understand why I was being treated this way. I couldnt believe that this was the same Dr that did my husband's knee surgery. When I met him back then he didnt seem so high and mighty. I also told him that I wasnt yelling at him or being rude. He then said that the tone of my voice told him otherwise. OK, the tone of my voice at this point was CRYING, if thats considered a tone. I was so mad, hurt, upset and more than anything I felt alone because the person that I went to for a referral didnt give me a referral. He was referring me to someone else. He told me that the neurosurgeons that did my back surgery will not perform peripheral nerve surgery so I asked him if he had ever removed a tumor like this and his answer surprised me. He said NO HE NEVER HAS DONE that type of surgery. Now by this point I am crying and trying to tell him that I speak the same way to all my doctors and believe me I have a lot, and not one of them even complained or told me that I am rude in any way, shape or form. I also added that maybe he needs to see things from the patients point of view before he makes stupid comments that were totally uncalled for. I was to upset to continue the conversation so I handed the phone to my husband who was listening to the whole thing unfold. He reluctantly took the phone because he was afraid he was going to say some things that he shouldnt say since he sometimes works with this Dr at the hospital. The first thing he said to my husband was, "I apologize to your wife, blah, blah, blah". I am convinced the only reason he apologized so quickly was because he knows that my husband along with all the other nurses he works with can make his life miserable. Well it was to late for an apology when it would have been a lot easier to say, "I dont deal with these type of tumors but we have another Dr in the practice that does and I would like you to see him." Now that would have been a lot easier wouldnt it? Not for this surgeon I guess because then thats admitting that he doesnt know how to do something and someone who is that pompous and thinks his shit dont stink wont be able to admit something like that. Now I have to call and make another appointment with another Dr! Ugh, it never ends!

Just to show the differences within the physician community I went for my GYN appointment today and I absolutely love her. She delivered my son and was there for me when I first started with my many illnesses so she has seen me go through the ringer. Her husband is a neurosurgeon and happened to do my back surgery. She is kind and compassionate and she called me throughout the entire time I was going through chemo just to check on me to see if there is anything I needed. Today she told me that she wants a pelvic ultrasound to check my ovaries and a C-125 blood test (which is not always accurate and can give false positives but in my case it makes sense to just do it to cover all bases). Then she gave me her home and cell phone numbers to call her anytime to let her know whats happening with my leg. How nice is that? She acts the way all Dr's should act.

My cousin called and had to cancel on me for tomorrows trip to see the Yarn Harlot. I wasnt upset because she had something going on with her daugher and had totally forgot about it. Family always comes first and we agreed to get together and maybe go somewhere with the spouses and leave all the kids with their grandparents. She has 2 girls, one is almost my daughers age (7) and the other is going to be 4 so she is a bit younger than my son who is 4.5 Then she has two boys who are 9 years old and her baby will be a year next month. He's the little sweety that I am making the sweater for. I am not sure if I discussed it before.

Since I havent talked about what my WIP's are lately so here it goes:
~Toe-up tofutsies
~Tidalwave socks with the BMFA Rockin' Socks Club Yarn for Apr-Walking on the Wild Tide
~ BMFA Spring Fling colorway, simple 2x2 ribbed socks
~Modified Jaywalkers for my husband in BMFA Henpecked colorway
~Crocheted ripple neck wrap for my Mom
~Sweet Pea Shawl from Deb Stoller's The Happy Hooker
~Cabled Tank Top from Knit Simple Magazine with Berocco's 'Love It' yarn in the denim colorway
~My cousin's baby's birthday sweater made with Schaefer Yarn in the KERMIE colorway made specifically for kids

Yup, there are a lot of projects going on and I am sure when I get back from WEBS I will have a couple more going! I really want to get a drop spindle and some fiber so I can learn how to spin. The wheels can be a little expensive though so I have to check them out and see if they are having a sale. The next post wil hopefully be filled with great knitting pictures and maybe if I am lucky a picture that includes a sock knit by the Harlot and myself.


Curly Cable said...

I can understand your frustations with the surgeon, what a complete ass! Makes you wonder what he is actually qualified in, the tumour you have surely is related to the pain you are in and the first thing that needs to be done is to have the bl**dy thing removed, even I can see that and I'm not a doctor, hopefully now he passed it on to another, they shall be a bit more compasionate and understanding! Hey you almost got as many WIP as me, all of mine seem to be coming on very slow, even though I am knitting most evenings after work, weird, wish I could wave a magic wand! It a shame your cousin had to drop out, wish I lived closer I would love to go to a Yarn Harlot event.

CurlyBrunette said...

To bad you dont live a bit closer then you could have come along. It was great! Stephanie is as funny as she is in her book. Yup, this blog is supposed to be about knitting and I dont have any FO's as of yet but they are coming along!